BYOT: Bring Your Own Teacup

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BYOT: BRING YOUR OWN TEACUP

Yesterday, on my way to friends from Wild + Free to have a fun breakfast together, I came into the lobby with my trusty tea cup in hand, as per usual, because I was in the middle of a hot morning cup, when my friends all giggled.

“You travel with your own china cup for drinking your tea?”

“Of course, doesn’t everyone?”

A habit begun many years ago with a heavy traveling life — just a few rhythms of grace in my life make it a little bit more pleasant, even when traveling. Predictable, comforting, and after all, who wants to have tea or coffee out of a styrofoam cup when you can have it out of a china cup? I buy them at second hand stores and then don’t mind if it gets chipped or broken — just a fun assortment. I place a cup, brown sugar packets, a spoon and tea bags in a tin of tea and it protects my cup from breaking.

Today, I am in Kentucky with one of my dearest in all the world friends, Gwennie, as many of you know her in my books. (And a story of delight about us many years ago in London in my new book, Well Lived!)

We are hanging around in our comfy clothes, chatting and chatting over many cups of caffeine, watching a great movie, eating grand meals and being friends. She is showing me new exercises with bands. We are eating fresh peach pie, and eating fresh raspberry pie! Laughing, crying, ordering a coat online just like hers! Twins again. I’m sipping from a beautiful mug of my friend that says, “Season of Mellow Fruitfulness,” which describes me.

What else do friends do?

So my Tea Time Tuesday podcast is a little short today to make as much time with my sweet friend as possible, but just wanted to be sure to say hi.

I had such fun and deep soul happiness to see so many kindred spirits at Wild + Free. Love you all so much. It filled my cup to the brim to be with you. And looking so forward to the other conferences coming up: Wellness Collective and Hutchmoot — and meeting more of you precious ones. Meanwhile, happy week!

This Is The Beginning Of A Life Well Lived

Not long ago, I came upon a grandchild of mine who was singing at the top of her lungs and dancing around the living room, and I joined in enthusiastically. It is an image of what I hope you will find in the pages of my new book, Well Lived: encouragement to experience life in its fullness, to enter into the joy that is offered, even amidst the mundane. I relearned ways to celebrate life, to soak in the beauty that every day holds.

Life for most of us is a long journey, lived over decades. We have time to grow, to become, to access what is deep within our hearts to “be,” and we will find the poise with which to live a meaningful and fruitful life. I pray you will give yourself time to grow and learn, and grace when you falter or make mistakes along the way. I hope that you, like me, will find the freedom to live vibrantly into your own unique story.

Read more about this in Well Lived.

Opening Others Hearts Through Hospitality

In the busy hustle of Oxford, rare was the occasion when anyone would host me for a cup of tea. We might meet in public places, however, I found that the way to my friends' hearts was often by making buttery toast with jam and tea, or preparing a warm bowl of soup on a cold winter night.

Food was the instrument through which many friendships were formed. Secrets were told on the background of soft Celtic music setting the stage, stories bubble up in the flickering candlelight, sighs of burdens released were almost palpable. We had gathered together in a community of mutual need and saw the miracle of companionship formed in front of us.

These were the ways I opened their hearts to me. From my American roots, I learned to open my door to literally hundreds of people throughout the years, and found that the same invitations worked for developing friendships in Oxford.

What was your secret for making your dearest friends? How did you open their hearts to you and cultivate deeper connections with them?

Preorder your copy of Well Lived today.

Be sure to go to Welllivedbook.com and sign up for my celebration evening on October 8, where we will all celebrate the release of this book into the world, and I will share stories lived and adventures taken in the land of Oxford.

Mothers Are Preparing An Army Of Light

When we embrace the call to servanthood and ministry, both in our own lives and in the training of our children, we are involved in the advancement of the influence of the kingdom of God on earth.

How amazing it is that even if we don’t have a title or a degree, we mothers can be a part of preparing an army that will advance the influence of light into this world. We do it simply by being faithful to do God’s work in and through our home, a strategic and divinely-designed training ground for heaven’s work on earth.

Read more about this in The Mom Walk.

Tea Time Tuesday: We Live By A Standard of Grace, Not Perfection

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Tea Time Tuesday

“By grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.” Eph. 2:8-9

Grace, not works, gives us strength.

We strive to make the best decisions we hope will shape in our children a life of true faith in God. We teach biblical morality, emphasize “do’s and don’ts,” read devotions to them, hope that somehow we will cultivate “spiritually alive” children. Yet, we can't by sheer force or the right formulas, or devotional curriculum make our children spiritual.

There is a mysterious process by which the Holy Spirit leads our children to see their need for Christ as we seek to cultivate their hearts. But it is entirely led by grace, informed by love, and carried out by the help of the Holy Spirit.

We put so much pressure on ourselves as mothers, then judge ourselves to be failures if we miss devotions, home cooked meals, a “tuck in” every night.

While it is incredibly wonderful to set our standards high, to live within these ideals.

Yet, we must hold ourselves to a standard of grace, not perfection.

None of us will ever be perfect, but we are the exact mothers our children need.

The grace of God is given in the midst of our circumstances, his peace comes when our difficulties would suggest otherwise. We cast our burdens on God because we cannot carry them. We choose joy by faith because we know, “in His presence is fullness of joy,” This is grace, favor because he loves us, seeks our companionship, has mercy.

Yet, we won't be able to have grace for our children if we do not have grace ourselves.

Galatians 5:1 reminds:

“It was for freedom that Christ set us free, therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery.”

Are there ways in your life that you try to live up to false expectations of others?

In my home, we did our best, but our best was certainly not perfection. We hoped they would respond passionately to their Creator by the grace, truth we lived out every day. We are not guided by culture, or what others feel is the “right way,” but we are led by God, His merciful love. We walk in the power of the Holy Spirit and rest in His grace.

Marriage Is A Long Dance Of Life

Though passion might be strong in the beginning, and disappointments found along the way, the ones who persevere in the life partnership will find it one of the most meaningful legacies of life.

When a couple finds grace to create a precious trust and can nurture that trust to cause the relationship to flourish, a story of strength, companionship, and truth unfolds — a story that offers hope to others that their marriage can endure and thrive.

Preorder your copy of Well Lived today.

My Saturday Morning Routine In Oxford

From the moment I opened my eyes on Saturday mornings in Oxford, I would bubble over with excitement. This was the morning when I would trek down the charming cobbled streets to my favorite coffee shop, where I would purchase their delectably strong brew and a fresh almond croissant.

My destination after that was a quiet, hidden park bench in front of a pond, where I would munch on my delicious pastry and sip my coffee as long as I could make it last. I considered this "my" bench.

Bench life was a part of my everyday ramblings. There was a bench right in front of my fairy house, a bench overlooking the River Thames, and many others throughout the city surrounded by beautiful Oxford greenery.

All of this portended toward a walking lifestyle. I didn't own a car, and so traipsing all over these interesting paths provided me great and memorable reflections that shaped my soul. Somehow, I was not as tempted to be addicted to social media because I had so many places to explore.

What are some of the beautiful ways you have broken your dependence on social media?

Preorder your copy of Well Lived today.

Painting The Reality Of God Onto The Walls Of Your Home

People often ask me why I emphasize beauty—art, candles, music, cups of tea, cinnamon rolls, great stories and books—as though these things are unnecessary and frivolous. I prioritize them because I want to bring the whole reality of God and His life into my home.

Home is the stage where the play of your life is delivered. As you clarify your vision, you are laying the foundations that will build influence and legacy. Own your home life right where you are. Your quiet and consistent labor will result in a story spoken with gratitude long after it has been given in the service of the One who is creating an eternal home for us in heaven.

Living out our ideals at home is not about reaching perfection, but about providing peace, hope, life, vision, and love to our families. Today, in the midst of all the messes, go ahead and smile, laugh, sing, and dance to the rhythms of God’s song.

Read more about this in Own Your Life.

Tea Time Tuesday: Motherhood is a Long Game

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“For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it?” Luke 14:28

Motherhood is a long game, a marathon. There is no quick fix to make it easy. No amount of ranting or complaining can change the fact that we live in a fallen world, a battleground for souls.

I wish I had known sooner, or better understood, or earlier admitted that I needed to accept this reality, to decide to grow up, determined to build my strength little by little. It would have saved me much emotional havoc in the long run.  

If I had understood that life was a battle for allegiance to the one who is true, not an issue of choosing the right activities, best curriculum, or most promising school choice. If only I knew that sacrificing my life to God's design would be the making of my character;

To have understood that the longer I loved, served, gave myself to training my children, the more I would understand His fatherhood of me, the complete sacrifice He was willing to make for me, his own unaware, shortsighted toddler child, who was often blind to the workings of His ways, the wisdom of His voice, even as my children were often blind to my wisdom given for their sakes.

If only I had known that the miracle of my children's long term faith and love for Him was not an issue of my being righteously mature or perfect in performance, but upon my dependence for Him working according to His power and mercy over time — that He was the one who made our paltry sacrifices enough to reach the hearts of our children, because He cared more than I did about loving, redeeming my children out of darkness into His light. That all He wanted from me was to give it up to Him, to live by faith, to enjoy the gift He had given into my hands — the gift of mothering these children, living this story, seeing His miracles right before my eyes.

He said, “Commit your way unto the Lord, trust also in Him and He will do it.” (Psalm 37:5)

If only I had known, it would have saved me much emotional havoc, worry, impatience, stress. I would have lived restfully in peace, enjoyed each day more, letting Him take the weight of fretting and worry.

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A Place & A People To Call Home

Life is crafted little by little through the years. Every home can be a beautiful part of God’s design, and you get to become the artist who crafts the life rhythms to ensure that love and faith are at the center and the sacred places and moments honored over the years. Each family will develop its own distinct way of living out the principles of wisdom and delight that shape a home into a lifegiving place.

We may call many places home during our lifetimes, yet each dwelling can be crafted with all the meaningful elements that matter to our families — a spirit of love, an invitation to belong, and beauty that is woven through each room. I truly believe that the home we cultivate is one of the greatest works of our lives.

Read more about this in Well Lived.